Lately things just have been going good. I’m not worrying about anyone else but myself right now and it feels amazing. I’m starting to have a mentality that not everyone is gonna be here all the time and that some people are just temporary and i have to accept that. You’re either w/ me or without me and I’m starting not to care about anyone anymore just bc I’m starting to see the true colors of people. I can’t keep worrying and looking out for people when i don’t even realize that I’ve been doing things for others and not for myself. How am i gonna be happy when I’m not even completely content with myself. I’m just starting to accept the fact that senior year is coming to an end and i’m really starting to see who’s worth my time, who are actually my friends, &who’s actually here for me and aren’t just asking whats wrong cause their curious. The type of people i need in my life are pull through w/ what they’re gonna do. I need people who are gonna be honest with me and not sugar coat things when i ask for advice. And lately, there’s only been like 4 people who have done just that. But it’s gooood, I’d rather have 4 real friends than 20 fake ones.

After tonight i realized i’m really blessed to have friends who put a little adventure in my life. It was a good time.

I Can't Stand When Someone's Mad At Me

I start feeling guilty and thoughts start lingering in my mind. I won’t be able to eat or sleep. I need to know that everything is on good terms or it’ll keep bothering me forever. Like always, the only solution is when I end up apologizing first even if it wasn’t my fault to begin with.

Is there something wrong with me or what? Sometimes, I need to take over my pride just to keep myself from being bothered.

R

There’s just something about you. It’s not just one thing actually. It’s all the little things you do that’s kept me interested since day one. You’re not the same as everyone else I’ve met. You’ve already managed to enter my late night thoughts and got me thinking about you from time to time even though it hasn’t been too long since we’ve met. I just can’t stop thinking about you. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted someone more than how much I want you before. Damn, what have you done to me?

I hate complete bitchy people, I hate when they complain too much, I hate when they try to push their luck to look for the best when only they’re just losing the best by making stupid decisions. I hate people who don’t know what they want, I hate people who complain that they don’t get this or that when they do. I just hate everyone who thinks they’re so superior. I hate everyone who pretty much think they’re suppose to be blessed or some shit. I hate people who think they’ll be loved even if they’re doing something that push away that person.

I just hate everyone for many many reasons.

Can’t wait till things finally fall into place. Things might just be too much for me to handle, especially at this time of year. Sometimes life gets tougher to make you stronger. Just have to believe in myself and hope for the best, after all when you hit rock bottom there’s nowhere else to go but up.

Just thankful for the people that are here for me right now. I’m glad to have chosen quality over quantity. Sucks this year isn’t ending as good as it started. I hope I make it through. Tough decisions and problems to face. On top of the things my head is trying to figure out, my heart is creeping up.

I just wish you cared, even just for a little bit. I guess I should just be happy that you are and that you’re okay. Leaving me with all this, thanks. I’ll be stronger and a better person, just have to keep in mind that this is just a phase. I’ll get by. Gonna need this new year, a fresh start. Just me and the few people that matters because they make me feel like I do.

I didn’t get what I deserve but through all this I got the push that I needed. No more, never again, or maybe at least not for a long time.

Friends. Nepotism.

If you were the CEO of your company, would you fire your bestfriend or a family member if they went overboard? Like for example, they start to be the boss of other things, just because they're close to you? Or they put their ideas into work without even discussing it with you?

For me.. I would fir him/her. Or atleast try to talk to him/her to calm down with their ideas and try to discuss them with me before starting em, and try to tell them to calm down, just because I'm the boss.. You know??

Send in you answers! I'd love to read them. Thank you!

Why?

Why is it that when I don't understand something, I get frustrated? I guess this is something I have to start getting used to.. Now that I'm in college (almost graduating). I used to be one of those people who understood mostly everything that was taught in class in one sitting, but now I have to actually sit down and read a mothrfkng book to understand what's going on. Now isn't that fun? Haha